When is it time?

A Guide to Help You

Our pets bring so much joy to our lives, and the thought of them not being there any more can often be unbearable. Unfortunately, it is very rare that a pet passes peacefully in their sleep, so we often have to make the tough decision as to when to let them go.

Sometimes, that decision is taken for us by an acute illness or incident. But as medicine and support for elderly pets improve, living to a ripe old age is much more common. Inevitably, as they approach their senior years, their ailments start impacting their quality of life, so it is our responsibility to recognise when it’s time to say goodbye.

Ohio State University made a very useful checklist to help you assess your pet’s quality of life, and signs you should consider should include:

1. Severe, ongoing pain

If pain is no longer manageable with medications, your pet’s quality of life will be massively reduced. When they are no longer able to do the things they love (such as fetch a ball or easily get up on the sofa, even with a ramp) it’s time to consider the gentle journey. Your vet can advise you on more subtle signs, but the most common are:

  • changes in character, such as grumpiness.
  • restlessness or inability to settle.
  • shallow breathing or panting.
  • yelping.
  • struggling to posture for defecation or urination.
  • inappropriate urination or accidents around the house.
  • lack of appetite OR constant hunger or thirst.

2. Incontinence

Many owners are prepared to deal with their pet toileting in the house and will happily keep the surroundings hygienic. This shows the level of love and dedication they have, but they will eventually need to reflect on how this impacts the animal itself:

Dogs: From a very young age, dogs are taught to go to the toilet outside and that going in the home isn’t allowed. Having accidents will make them miserable and very stressed about being told off. Sometimes incontinence is related to treatable illnesses, so speaking to your vet to make sure that any underlying issues are managed is key.

Cats: Cats are extremely clean animals who do not like to be dirty, so having accidents will make them stressed and upset. Again, these may be related to a treatable illness, so seeking advice from your regular vet is highly recommended.

3. Lack of mobility

Mobility issues can cause many secondary problems, such as bedsores, feeling the cold more acutely, and an inability to easily hydrate or eat. Humans with minimal or no mobility can lead very full lives as we have many other ways of occupying ourselves, while pets do not. Their entire life revolves around their owner and, particularly for dogs, their walks and playtime. Remember how much joy exercising and playing brought your pet when they were younger? If that is no longer possible, you need to consider what is best for your four-legged friend.

4. News of a terminal disease

Heart-breaking though it is, news of a terminal disease may not be enough of a reason to put your pet to sleep. If they are still comfortable and finding pleasure in their day, then enjoying the twilight of their life with them is OK. Do speak to your vet about the diagnosis, though, as many will involve a sudden or painful deterioration, which is the very thing we want to spare your pet from. When the chances are that the decline will be rapid, having a time frame can be beneficial as the old adage of ‘better a week too early than a minute too late’ applies.

5. The good days are getting rarer…

‘More good days than bad ones’ is one of the ways vets will measure quality of life. A problem with assessing the ailments of elderly animals is that they come on slowly, so could go unnoticed for quite a while. As the ‘bad days’ get more common, we often find owners grasping for the chance of ‘one more good day’ as they inevitably, and sadly, get further and further apart. If that’s the case, you need to decide where you are going to draw the line.

6. Family and friends telling you they think it is time

They could be wrong, of course, but because they don’t see your pet daily, they can often recognise deterioration more clearly than you might be able to.

Reasons that are more difficult to accept…

More often than not, the decision to euthanise a pet is based entirely on their needs. However, there are some entirely valid reasons to choose to do so that are not solely about your pet:

You can no longer afford the necessary treatments

Treatment options are usually vast, and they’re constantly evolving as new research comes out. Insurance is helpful, but not everyone has it, and even if they do, it rarely covers all the costs. It is understandable to feel sad, guilty or angry about not being able to afford the treatments that are available, but all you (and your vet) can do is make a quality-of-life decision for your pet. This often means accepting euthanasia as a viable option rather than putting yourself into financial difficulty.

The whole household revolves around their needs

Your children, relationships, other animals, and maybe even your professional life can be totally disrupted by caring for a sick pet. This is manageable in the case of an acute and recoverable illness, where things improve in weeks. But in the case of a chronic condition, there comes a point when you have to consider the wider picture. This doesn’t mean you don’t care about your pet; it means you can’t do everything for everyone, so a final gentle journey filled with love may be the best decision.